A description of what it is like to be me. In my head...in my world...what I think...what I do...how i poo...but never why...and never about pie...

Friday, November 26, 2004

The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, a dream and a phone call to an ex...

Monty Python & the Holy Grail might just be one of the greatest movies of all time. Everytime I think about it it cracks me up. Especially this particular scene:

[Holding the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch]
King Arthur: How does it... um... how does it work?
Lancelot: I know not, my liege.
King Arthur: Consult the Book of Armaments.
Brother Maynard: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
Cleric: [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu...
Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother...
Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.
Brother Maynard: Amen.
All: Amen.
King Arthur: Right. One... two... five.
Galahad: Three, sir.
King Arthur: Three.

This was stolen from here: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0071853/quotes

(see I give credit where it is due)

Today is thanksgiving and I've already eaten twice. I can't wait to finish the first meal so I can digest and make my turkey sandwhich on white bread with tons of mayo, salt, pepper and lettuce. YUMMY in my ever growing TUMMY. At least I excercised this morning. Besides, Abraham Lincoln himself said: "It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues."


Oh yes, I remember what I originally wanted to write about. I woke up this morning, the wind was blowing strong outside and I had just had the most compelling dream. The significance felt so strong that it inspired me to act upon it. The last time I remeber waking up to the wind blowing in that manner, it was early on the morning of my last birthday. The wind actually woke me up, as if it was calling to me or trying to tell me something. Although at the time, since it had woken me up from a beautiful slumber, I was only trying to block it out. I tried putting the pillow over my head (could still hear it) I tried putting my headphones on (still it penetrated my ears) finally I made earplugs out of toilet paper combined with the pillow over the head and I was able to go back to sleep. But the ironic thing was this. After I looked it up in my "sign" book it told me that wind represents the universe or God or something spiritual trying to tell you something adn that you should listen to it. And all I was trying to do was make it go away. I wasn't receptive to it.
So the dream became more significant because of the blowing wind. Make sense?
So anyway, on with my saga...
The dream consisted of an ex boyfriend that I had not thought about consciously in God only knows how long. I know it has been 8yrs since I've laid eyes on the boy. He was my boyfriend from high school.
After I woke up, reflected on it a while, wrote about it my journal, volunteered, went for a walk, showered, got dressed and drove 20 minutes to my parents house, (deep breath, I point all these things out b/c at this point, I have had AMPLE time to reflect on the absurdity/reality/significance/silliness of it all. continue thought here...) I went downstairs in the basement, typed his name into yahoo's people search and lo and behold his address and phone number were staring back at me. I debated in my head weather or not to call him, why, what to say, what not to say, what to say, etc..
So I called.
I held my breath as I prayed for him to not answer so I could hear his voice and see if it was him or not. Thanks GOD! It was a machine....and it was him. As soon as it beeped, I hung up.

BUT then about 15 minutes later, I called back (holding breath, praying no one will answer b/c maybe last time he was monitoring and this time might decide to pick up-[ala Swingers]).
I think it went relatively well and I left my number so it is done.
If I never hear from him, I have lost nothing.
But, at least I won't be consumed with wondering if I should or shouldn't have called.
What is that other quote? Something about no one ever regrets the things they DID do, just the things they didn't? Something like that anyways. Gosh I am, really diggin on the quotes tonite! Strange.

Happy Turkey Day.
Gobble Gobble.


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