A description of what it is like to be me. In my head...in my world...what I think...what I do...how i poo...but never why...and never about pie...

Tuesday, November 09, 2004


Dear Mother Fucker in your too much money havin, little cock drivin, pretentious bitch SUV, Lexus, BMW, ESCALADE, NAVIGATOR, etc...

Please kindly get the fuck off my road. You drive like a complete asshole. Let me enlighten you on a few rules to road ettiquette as you clearly have never been taught them.

Scenerio #1: There is a car in the middle lane going significantly slower than all of traffic around. Yes, he is the moron, however, it does not mean that if you ride his ass 3 inches from his bumper he will miraculously find his gas pedal. This is only going to cause an accident, in which case I no longer think it should be called an "accident", but an instigated wreck.

Scenario #2: I am merging onto the highway. YOU are in the far right lane that I WILL be coming into. You see me, I know you do b/c you have now decided to speed up so that I cannot get onto your road? Let me tell you something, I AM coming onto your road and you need to be aware of this and get over into one of the many other 5 lanes available so that I may safely enter the highway without having to force you into the other lane.

Let me preface this one with this: I drive a 4 cylinder big 'ol jeep that goes fast on the downhill and slow on the uphill. I cannot help it, that's how it drives.
Scenario#3: I am in the fast lane trying to pass someone and I am on the down hill but there is an uphill approaching rapidly. I KNOW that I must get over as soon as I pass pokey to allow speedy "small cock" porche behind me b/c he is about to become my own personal enema if I don't. As soon as I have passed pokey and have given a sufficient amount of room so that I can get over in his lane without cutting him off, impatient little dicked porshe guy passes me on the right!

Okay, I'm finished venting now.
Gotta get to wizzork.


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